Coldness

It's windy, overcast, 58F...cold outside.

It's cold inside, too. I've been lost the past few days. I miss Stace like hell. I hate it that I don't have her to talk to. I hate it that I sent out photos of the kids today and I didn't get back a response saying "they're beautiful bitch." I hate it that she's gone and I feel so alone. I hate it that I'm out here in CA and not near John to help with the boys or help with whatever he might need.

Hate it hate it hate it. Goddamnit. It's all so fucking unfair. Not just to me but to everyone who loved her.

And that's the kind of mood I'm in.